Hat of Infinite Humor
donated by Arlan Brambletow
Description: The hat is gray and pointed, with a wide brim. It is dotted with small holes and suspicious-looking burn marks. It bears remarkable resemblance to the one that Fizban wore in the War of the Lance.
History: One night while I was on my Wanderlust close to Flotsam I wandered upon the camp of this remarkable mage. He was asleep by the embers of his campfire, and his hat had fallen off. I decided to pick it up and dust it off for him, then I noticed all of the holes in it. I decided that the next time I was in town I would get a much nicer one for him, and put the hat on, in order to keep it warm in case it was magical and he didn't want a new one. He must have been rather careless, though, because he never came looking for it...
How it Works: As I was saying, I was on my way to Flotsam (their jails aren't first-rate like the ones in Palanthas, mind you...) when I found a note inside the hat. It read "Wear the Hat of Infinite Humor in a crowded area, spin around three times while flapping your arms like a chicken, and yell OWAH TAGOO SIAM." Naturally, I did so at the first opportunity, and everyone began pointing and laughing. So when I was taken to the jail, I tried it out, to cheer everyone up. Everyone only glared at me, though, so I suppose it doesn't always work...
(Author's note: The true version of this story is much different from the kender's viewpoint. The hat is not, in fact, magical. The mage, having heard that Raistlin Majere commonly kept interesting items for kender to find in order to protect the true valuables, purchased the hat fairly cheaply hid the aforementioned note inside. The result was that he awoke from his journey, shrugged off the loss of the hat, and continued on his search for the Forest of Wayreth.)